Milk is Evil
by Natsu-and-Lucy-forever15
Summary: When Winry and Al force Ed to have some milk... WARNING: MAY CONTAIN A STUBBORN FORMER ALCHEMIST AND SLIGHT EDWIN!


**A/N: So this is my first Fullmetal Alchemist (Brotherhood) Fanfic! The idea from this fic came from personal expirence. And I'm like 'Hey Edward and I have something in common, we hate milk' and that's where the inspiration came from! I hope you enjoy this and please note that the characters (mostly Ed) are kinda OOC!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own FMA!**

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"Brother, can't you at least try it?" Alphonse pleaded, using his puppy dog eyes. Man was it good to be back in a human body.

"No!" Edward stubbornly said, "You decided to put milk in it, and I hate milk."

Al sighed and put the cup of hot chocolate down. After all the crap that happened, he thought it would be great to relax and try new things, since they just experienced firsthand that you only live once. So, it was only natural to try and get Ed on it too. And that's not going to well. The first thing he decided to do differently was put milk in their hot chocolate, so Ed would experience the goodness of milk. And now Ed's being the stubborn hot head he is.

"Fine then, stay short forever. I won't care," Alphonse muttered, hoping his reverse psychology method would work.

"Ha!" Ed suddenly shouted, causing Al to spill hot chocolate on his new suit. And he was planning to wear that when he goes to Xing… "That won't work on me! I'm tall now!"

"Hardly…" Alphonse mumbled peeved off that Ed just ruined the suit he was going to Xing with.

"They all said milk would make you grow! Well I'm living proof that you don't need milk to grow!" Ed shouted in victory.

"Well I'm younger than you, I drink milk, and I'm taller than you," Al pointed out.

"No way! I'm taller!" Ed defended, standing up and pulling Al with him. He forced Al to stand back to back with him, "Man, this is too hard to see who's taller."

"Hey guys!" a voice cooed, revealing it to be the blonde haired girl that is Winry Rockbell.

"Winry! Great! Can you come over here and see who's taller out of me and Al?" Ed asked.

"But it's pretty obvious; it's Al." She answered simply.

A second later found Ed sulking on the floor, muttering, "Yeah, well what would you know? You stupid gear head."

A wrench came swinging at Ed's head, leaving him bleeding on the floor.

Al sweat-dropped and Winry sighed, turning to look at Al, "So what's got him wigged out about height this time?"

"Well I just wanted him to try something with milk in it, and then we started talking about how milk gets you taller, and yeah," Al explained, a thoughtful expression on his face.

Winry nodded, going into the kitchen, "We still have a gallon of milk! I think we can make this work!" She came back out of the kitchen with a glass for herself, sitting on the couch.

"Hey Winry, are you going adjust brothers automail?" Al asked, plopping himself right next to her, staring at his brothers automail leg.

Winry shook her head, "Not today. I'm off today, but I mean if there's something wrong with it, I'll take a look."

"I don't think there's anything wrong with it…" Al pondered aloud.

"Ughh! That hurt," Ed mumbled, waking up from his unconscious state, sitting up and rubbing his head.

"So you ready to try some milk?" Winry asked, ignoring the golden haired boy's pain.

"Eww. I hate milk," Ed grumbled, not facing the two on the couch.

"But it's good for you!" Winry pleaded, getting off the couch and holding the milk towards him.

"But it's disgusting," He grumbled once again, not noticing the blonde with a death glare in her eyes.

"But you've never tried it," uttered Winry, creeping closer to an unsuspecting Ed. Al sighed as he watched, wondering if he says that Winry put her lips on the glass, if Ed would actually consider drinking milk.

Before Ed could retort something back, Winry pounced on him, yelling, "YOU'RE GONNA DRINK THE FRICKING MILK, AND YOU ARE GOING TO LIKE IT!" Seriously, how did she fall in love with such a stubborn, hot headed, extremely dedicated person?

"NOOO! MILK IS EVIL!" Ed shouted, avoiding the cup of milk. Al watched in amusement as the two kept bickering, astonished that none of the milk spilled out of the cup yet. Speaking of spilled…

"Hey guys," Al started, standing up from the couch. He knew that they were probably too caught up in their fight to notice him, but he still wanted to let them know, "I'm going to change and put this suit to soak in water. I'll be right back." Al left the room, leaving an angered Winry forcing a stubborn Ed to drink milk. Al ran up the stairs and opened the door to his room, rushing into his closet. "Hmm, Aha!" Al grabbed a random shirt and throw the other shirt off, slipping on the shirt he just got. "Now to soak this in some water…"

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Meanwhile downstairs, Winry was still trying to get Ed to drink milk. And so far, no progress. Winry sighed in defeat, pulling away from Ed, "Why can't you just drink the milk and this could be over with?"

"How can you drink the milk and not be disgusted?" Ed asked, shifting his weight to his elbows and looking up at Winry.

"Because milk helps people get taller, and it doesn't taste all that bad…" Winry assured.

Ed chuckled, "Sorry, that won't work. It probably would've if I wasn't taller than you!"

Winry rolled her eyes and stood up, extending a hand for Ed. Ed took it and stood up, dusting himself off. "So, you really aren't going drink the milk?" Ed nodded, crossing his arms over his chest. "What if I… frick this is hard to come up with!" Winry groaned, running a frustrated hand through her blonde hair.

Al came down the stairs and went straight in to the kitchen, ready to make sure Ed had milk and liked it. Going to the fridge, he noticed that the gallon of milk was on the counter. _'Winry must've gotten another glass of milk'_ He grabbed a cup and poured milk in it, only thinking, _'Serious, how does he not like milk?'_ "Ed! I have a present to you!" Al ran out of the kitchen, making sure to not drop any of the milk on the way out.

Winry and Ed both turned towards to Al, Ed's eyes filling with horror as he saw what was in Al's hand. Instantly, Ed started shaking his head, "No, I already told Winry, I'm not drinking it!"

"Brother! Please!" Al pleaded, trying the puppy dog eyes again.

"No! I'd rather have that bastard Roy put me through cruel and unusual punishment than to drink milk!"

"Wait," Winry started, "What if the cruel and unusual punishment is to drink milk?"

The three stayed quiet for a moment, attempting to understand what Winry had just said. "Then I wouldn't drink it!" Ed snapped.

Al sighed in irritation and held the bridge of his nose, "What if we make you a deal?"

"Depends," Ed said, walking over to the couch and sitting down.

"I'll… let you… do something that you typically don't do?" Winry asked, not knowing what to say. How do people come up with this stuff right off the back? Ed smirked and shook his head, not pleased with Winry's offer, but amused with her frustration. "I'll… um…"

"She'll let you kiss her!" Al suddenly shouted.

"Yeah! I'll let you- wait what?!" Winry screeched, snapping her head to Alphonse, her face flushed. Ed was a little red in the face too. She walked over to Al, whispering "Why did you say that?!"

Al smiled and whispered back, "Because it's an offer he can't refuse! Now go out and sell it!"

Winry sighed as she turned back to Ed, her blush increasing, "Yes Ed. If you drink that entire glass of milk, you can kiss me…" She gestured to the glass Al was holding.

Ed thought about his brother's offer. Drink the milk and kiss Winry? Seems pretty legit… "F-Fine…" Ed muttered, his blush deepening.

"Yeah!" Al cheered, walking closer to Ed and giving him the cup. Al was ecstatic. His brother was about to kiss his future wife and finally drink milk! It's the best of both worlds!

Ed hesitantly took the cup, staring down at the milk. "Just one sip?"

"If you want the deal to be official, one glass," Winry corrected, rolling her eyes at the exaggerated sweat dripping down his forehead. I mean really?! It's just milk.

"Just, one glass," Ed reassured himself, continuing to stare at the white liquid in front of him.

"One glass," Al said, his patience running thin.

"One gla-"

"Stop stalling!" Winry and Alphonse shouted. Ed gulped and raised the glass to his lips slowly, closing his eyes. Al watched intently as the glass reached his lips, suddenly hearing gulping noises. Winry's eyes widen as the content in the cup decreased, not believing what she was seeing. Ed was drinking milk. Ed. Drinking. Milk!

Suddenly, Edward spat out all the milk he just drank, his face turning green. "THIS TASTED EVEN WORSE THAN I REMEMBER!"

Winry and Al's face dropped, "W-What?" They stared in disbelief as Ed put the milk on the floor and was now gagging uncontrollably. Al sighed and took the milk off the floor, raising it to his lips. What? He's not going to let the milk go to waste. Al took a sip of the milk and quickly understood. It tasted…. Sour…

"Uh, Winry?" Al asked, struggling to swallow the milk he just sipped.

"Yeah Al?" Winry said disappointedly. Know not only does she have to kiss Ed, which she can't say she's _completely _upset about doing, but Ed still doesn't like milk!

"Um when I went upstairs, did you get another glass of milk?"

"No, why?" Winry asked, staring at the poor former alchemist, squirming on the floor and holding his neck.

"Winry, try the milk." Al handed Winry the milk. Winry stared suspiciously at the milk, and hesitantly took a sip of it. Winry immediately spat it out, "WHAT THE HECK?! ITS SPOILED!?"

_'Guess when Winry went to go get milk, she left it out… Oops?' _Al thought, feeling guilty for giving his brother spoiled milk. But, at least he got one good thing out of it. "Ed, well think about it like this, you still get to kiss Winry!"

"No he doesn't!" Winry retorted, "He never finished it!"

"You guys forced me to drink this evil milk; I think I deserve a kiss!" Ed shouted, standing up and dusting himself off. Without hesitation he walked up to Winry and smashed his lips on hers, leaving Winry stunned. Al chuckled silently and walked into the kitchen, oddly finding Pinako by the stove. "Hey Pinako!"

"Hello Alphonse, where's your midget of a brother?" She asked, stirring something on the stove.

"Making out with Winry. Whatcha making?" He asked curiously.

"The one thing with milk that your brother can actually stand, stew."

"Yeah!" Alphonse cheered. _'Wait a minute…'_

So to make this long story short, for the rest of the night, Winry, Alphonse and Pinako had to struggle to eat the stew while Edward stared, well more like glared, at the stew, muttering, "Milk is evil," every now and then.

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**Told you they were OOC :( Anyway, don't hesitate to leave a review and suggest any FMA fics for me to do!  
Stay Guapo, Guapo Zombies**


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